No control. None whatsoever.

The fans at Schlockfest brought me Nesquik.

“Ah, my old nemesis. I’ve defeated you before.”

I had Sandra hide the stuff where I couldn’t find it when we got home.

Well, just KNOWING IT WAS IN THE HOUSE did me in. I begged, she consented, and I’ve plowed through at least 4000 calories worth of the stuff in three days.

The good news is that it hasn’t killed me yet. The bad news is that the fans bought one of those 80-serving tubs. The worst news is that it’s not 80 servings for me. It’s like 25, or maybe 30.

–Howard

25 thoughts on “No control. None whatsoever.”

  1. Could you find a sugary chocolate drink purveyor besides Nestle? They have a pretty lousy record on the whole `not starving African babies for profit’ front…and it’s not like they’re the only source of milk flavorings out there.

    1. Well, Fox’s u-Bet Syrup is really hard to find outside NYC…
      (Yes, there is a bottle in my fridge at the moment. I got it in Manhattan.)

      1. As did I; but since I live in Manhattan, it wasn’t much of a stretch for me. Fox just came out with a malt syrup, too…I’m considering trying that.

        1. Interestingly enough, we tried two Gristede’s and two other stores whose names I can’t remember before finding it at the D’Agostino’s on Lexington at 76th. Apparently, it’s easier to find in Brooklyn and the Bronx than Manhattan.

          I’d like to try the malt syrup. Have to look for it next time I’m there.

    2. I rather like “Crusha” milk shake syrup as used by caterers…
      but I prefer Lime flavour. Devil of a job to get hold of it is….
      even living less that 3 miles from the factory in Edmonton! (UK that is)

    3. Nestle and African Babies

      Ugh. Not THIS again. I’ve read both sides on that one, and I’m still not convinced. Until and unless the entire world comes out and agrees that infant formulas should not be provided, and that breast-feeding is the only true, safe, and legal way to feed babies, I can’t see you holding Nestle accountable for the problem.

      Sure, they could sell it for less, or spend more trying to educate the mothers who use it… but the fundamental problem is that NOBODY over there has enough food. If mom was getting enough to eat, nursing wouldn’t be a problem. If the parents had enough money, FOOD wouldn’t be a problem. If the economies over there weren’t fraught with race-war drains and rampant corruption, MONEY wouldn’t be a problem.

      Blaming Nestle for starving babies is like blaming smoke-alarm manufacturers for carbon monoxide deaths.

      Besides, Nesquik has the flavor I like. I’ve tried the others, and I always come back.

      –Howard

      1. Re: Nestle and African Babies

        It’s not so much that they pulled this stunt in the first place (though that was rather nikulturny, as our Russian friends would say). What put me off Nestle Co forever was that they agreed to stop handing out free samples in order to deal with the boycott; then went right back to doing it again after everyone had moved on.

        In short; them and the horse they rode in on.

      2. Gee, and I thought you were an Ovaltine guy…

        But I guess OvalQuik can go either way.

        ah, memories of childhood. I love Chocolate Malt Ovaltine. Has lots of vitamins in it, too! (I tell myself that to justify occasionally just eating spoonfuls of the dry mix, ahem)

        So, do you ever just eat the mix dry? Are there enough dry mix eaters out there to start a support group?

        1. Re: Gee, and I thought you were an Ovaltine guy…

          mmm… Dry mix.
          Although when eating the dry mix, you always have to consciously remember not to breath either in or out when the spoon is just in front of your face… or Hilarity/gagging ensues.

          1. LMAO

            Oh, I have SO done that!

            You know, that’s the great thing about the internet. It makes it easy to run into other people who do the same weird stuff you do. 🙂

  2. So yer saying…

    That making a OvelQuik label, and mixing a tub each of the needed materials, and then Fed-Exing it you you…

    Bad idea?

  3. I’m stunned that nobody else has said this yet….

    “Step away from the tub of happiness.” [Ominous HUMMMMMM]

    (Um… does Howard’s pencil make an ominous HUMMMMMM?)

    1. Re: I’m stunned that nobody else has said this yet….

      Dunno, but give me some time and few bits and I bet you I could make it do so…

      Definitly if it’s one of those fancy push-pencils.

    2. Re: I’m stunned that nobody else has said this yet….

      Only if he draws fast enough.
      That was my thought too, though… Howard, is THIS your inspiration for Schlock’s Ovalquik addiction? :>

      1. Re: Ovalkwik

        Of COURSE that’s where Schlock’s addiction comes from. The early years of Schlock were drawn when I was practically LIVING off of Nesquik. It’s only been recently (the last 18 months, anyway) that I’ve been able to completely kick the habit.

        –Howard

  4. Addiction is an ugly thing to see. 😀

    Maybe y’all should get Howard on a sugar high at his next convention and tape the results? Betcha he gives Kiki a good run for her money.

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