I had a free rental coming to me (Blockbuster Rewards) and I spent it on the Director’s Cut of Alexander.

This film is beautiful, gorey, sexy, and utterly incomprehensible. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why these people are doing what they’re doing, or what the significance is of what they do next. Sure, there are a couple of driving forces behind Alexander’s push into Asia — his belief that if he goes far enough he can sail home, and some weirdness in his relationship with his mother — but that’s about the extent of what’s making sense. Yeah, yeah, it’s a war of conquest, I get that. But these court and field intrigues need just a wee bit more explaining.

The Director’s Cut was billed as being “faster paced” and “more action-packed.” I have to wonder if they shortened the film by taking out all the bits where Anthony Hopkins explains why so-and-so does such-and-such.

(Aside: Did Rosario Dawson get a nose-job? In Men In Black II, The Rundown, and Frank Miller’s Sin City I remember her left nostril being canted up more sharply than her right, so much so that it was almost comically distracting. In Alexander I’m barely noticing it. Good camera work, digital nostril-tweaks in post, or surgery?)

We stopped watching 2 hours into the movie, because it’s now past bedtime and the film still isn’t making sense. I’ll tune back in tomorrow to see the elephant, provided it’s still in the Director’s cut.

–Howard “I’m really happy I didn’t see this in theaters” Tayler

I drove into downtown (hah!) Provo today to get my allergy shot, pick up a comic book or two, and grab groceries at Sam’s Club (the Walmart-owned membership warehouse).

The comic book store, Dragon’s Keep, had a big “CLOSED” sign in the front window, and the displays looked suspicously empty. I parked, walked up to the glass, and peered inside. Sure enough, it looked like the store wouldn’t be opening again, with racks emptied, furniture missing, and so forth.

I got depressed. I guess the feeling would be akin to an auto-worker hearing about plant closures. I started thinking about my own revenue stream trickle, and before long all the energy I had saved up for this afternoon’s coloring session had seeped right out of me.

I got home and called Dragon’s Keep. I got Jason on the phone, and he said “nothing’s wrong. We’re moving.” They got a great “move right now” deal on a larger store, and for the next few days things will be hectic. If/when they do a Grand Reopening, I’ll be there passing out sketches.

I feel much better now. Hey, look! There’s strips I need to color!

–Howard

I didn’t do any drawing today, and I did feel a little under the weather, but I’m pretty sure I’m all better.

No, my shoulder isn’t completely back up to spec, and I still can’t sleep on it, and I’m still taking Vitamin I and the occasional muscle relaxant, but life seems to be back to normal. That, for me, is going to have have to count as “all better.” Once I’m going to the gym again I can say “back in fighting trim,” and as of today that future proclamation no longer seems so far off. Like maybe Friday.

Nowhere is my progress more clear than in a comparison of photographs, one taken in the afternoon on July 14th, following my doctor’s visit the day of the injury, and the other taken about 20 minutes ago in my recently reorganized office studio.

Pictures behind the cut…

Obviously Elf has a thing for Tagon. The extent of that ‘thing,’ and whether or not its existence will ever be discovered, rewarded, punished, or reciprocated remains to be seen.

I’ve already written it. Your answers to the poll below won’t influence the story (much). I just want to know in advance how many of you I’m going to disappoint. 🙂

–Howard