Here’s a useful LJ meme:

Identify one goal that you’ve had, and that you’ve not been able to reach in the past.

State WHY you don’t think you’ve reached it.

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Here’s mine: I’ve been meaning to drop my body fat percentage to the low teens for about 6 years. I’ve made very careful plans that include nutrition and exercise schedules. Today my body fat percentage stands at 24%, which is too high by about 10%, or (on me) close to 20 pounds.

Why haven’t I reached it? Because the goal was set ABOVE that which I was willing to settle for, and I’ve consistently compromised and settled for much less. Usually this happens because other things (earning money, goofing off, cartooning, spending time with the family, eating foods I love) have been prioritized ABOVE the elements of nutrition and exercise.

This meme isn’t about coming up with a solution to the problem. It’s about IDENTIFYING the problem. That said, I’m well on my way to solving the problem above — I deprioritized some activities, and have regular exercise and appropriate eating back on my schedule. The 24% figure above likely represents a DROP of at least 4%.

–Howard

I’m not sure it means all that much in practical terms for the jury in the Peterson trial to sentence him to death. The media has made a big deal out of the fact that the State of California is not in the habit of executing those so sentenced. I really feel for that jury: it’s one thing to read about the atrocities men commit against their loved ones in the paper. It’s another thing entirely to spend 9 months talking about one guy, and the evil things he allegedly did, while he, his family, and his victims’ family sits on.

To the Peterson jury: Good on you. You made it through this one, and from the sound of things you made a tough call.

A friend of mine was a juror for a local murder trial. The ex-husband in that sad story murdered his ex-wife with a shotgun at her front door… while their daughter looked on. The daughter testified against her dad. My friend’s experience was gut-wrenching, but fortunately not drawn out. He came back to work after the trial at peace with himself, which is probably as much as any juror in a capital trial can hope for.

I’m also reminded of the recent Lori Hacking case here in Utah. Mark Hacking is yet another man whose lies and infidelities (whether consummated or not) led him down a darkened path where the only exit he could see required him to commit a murder. Ah, the deceptions we practice upon ourselves when we begin deceiving others… foremost among them is the mistaken belief that we can choose a destination other than the one at the end of the road we’re on without having to leave that road first.

I have little doubt that Scott killed Laci. Sure, it’s POSSIBLE that this was a third-party crime, but even without evidence, when the wife is murdered, the lying, cheating husband is ALWAYS the suspect at the top of the list. We married men have a horrible, horrible track record. Not all of us, mind you, but there’s this small, sociopathic segment in our demographic that makes us all look like potential killers, like murderers waiting only for a motive.

–Howard

There’s this parking lot at the Provo Towne Center (yes, they really spelled it that way, and yes, it’s just a big shopping mall) where I like to go see movies. On the way to see a movie, if you come from the direction I come from, you have three choices for crossing that parking lot:

1) The inside track, where you really ought to slow the hell down for pedestrians you MANIAC.
2) The outside track, where you drive a good quarter mile out of the way of ANYTHING, and where the 15 mph speed limit is enforced by a broad, hairpin turn that I can take at about 40 if I’m pushing my luck.
3) The lawless route across the middle of the parking lot.

On the way back from a movie this evening (I went out to see the 10:20pm showing of Blade: Trinity. The grade: C-. Wait for the DVD, and then rent it with friends who can help you mock the movie) I decided to take route #3.

Cutting across an empty parking lot at 40mph at 12:20am is surreal. Especially when the lines are all about 45 degrees offset from your direction of travel. As I was crossing, it occurred to me that the adrenaline rush I was experiencing was due to the fact that I was crossing those lines a LOT.

See, as drivers we learn to stay inside the lines, and when we cross the lines we THINK about it first — unless we’re caught in a moment of carelessness, in which case we get adrenaline rushes from the realization that we slipped outside of our allocated stretch of road unconsciously. We spend our ENTIRE BEHIND-THE-WHEEL LIVES trying as hard as we can to stay inside those lines.

Crossing the parking lot forces me to check ALL angles of approach, because the lines can’t protect me. Not only is it POSSIBLE that a car could be coming the other way… it’s LIKELY that they could be coming the other way, and they CERTAINLY aren’t expecting ME to be zipping across their precious line-delimited lane. Hence the adrenaline.

And now, for the profound metaphor: our lives are like this. Mostly we try to stay inside the lines, where our expectations for others and their expectations for us are automatically managed. Sometimes, though, we have to change lanes. At other times (puberty, anyone?) we find ourselves on unpainted road. At still other times we cross entire parking lots. I’m not trying to encourage that kind of behavior, because although there’s growth to be found on all paths, there’s better ways to learn caution than by broadsiding someone in the parking lot.

End of metaphor.

–Howard

I’d like to take a moment to clarify something, lest anyone get absolutely the wrong idea about the Church I attend, per this rant. You see, in the media these days (and the blogosphere is “media”) we focus a lot on the negative because it is NEWS. The positive, the stuff that happens right, and regularly, goes without mention.

The sabbath-day sacrament services I attend each week never leave any doubt as to who we worship and why. Christ is always at the center of things. Yes, it’s unconscionable that even an ancillary, social activity could take place in which that focus is lost, and yes, I’ll be speaking to the Bishopric about it (though I’d be surprised if they weren’t as taken aback as I was), but no, this isn’t a typical sort of thing. And in years past they’ve really floored me with retellings of the Christmas story, but I wasn’t blogging back then.

Just so we’re clear on it. I’m positive that this evening’s event was an aberration that will be gently and lovingly corrected, and my earlier temper tantrum (what you guys read was me holding WAAAAY back) had enough self-righteous hubris in it to fuel the entire Moral Majority for… okay, I’ll be conservative (rimshot)… fifteen or twenty seconds. I’m just glad I didn’t pick up the phone and start talking to people.

–Howard