I’ve been struggling with scripts lately, and finally wrote the tricky bit whose most general description might spoil things for you.

I just got back from seeing The Fantastic Four. My reaction: I loved it. The Thing was PERFECT.

Scroll down and read the Open Letter for more.

Upshot: I need to eat these words. First, though, a nap. I had a big lunch, and I’m full just now.

–Howard

My mother and father-in-law are in town for a few days. They arrived last night while I was pulling my shift at the Temple, and will be here until sometime Sunday. It’s kind of nice having company over, and the kids love having Grandma and Grandpa around.

Every so often it reminds me of the fact that my kids didn’t get a Grandma or Grandpa from my side of the family. They got some uncles and aunts, some cousins, and some “fake” relatives like Uncle Dave (chalain), but my Mom and Dad are a single wedding portrait on the wall, taken back in the late 60’s. I wonder whether they would have been good grandparents. They divorced shortly before their deaths (Mom in a car accident two years following the divorce, and Dad had a heart attack two years after that), so if they’d lived and remarried, maybe I’d have been stuck trying to explain why there were four grandparents on my side of the clan. Maybe I’d have a step-mom and a step-dad I could irrationally resent, so visits from paternal grandparents could be poisoned by my own bitterness. Or maybe everything would have been wonderful, and there would be an additional source of Christmas presents for the children of the perpetually impoverished cartoonist.

No, I’m pretty sure that if my parents had lived, I would NOT have become a cartoonist. Things would have been different enough that pretty much everything I’ve done in the last 20 years would have been done a little differently, with the cumulative effect being dramatic. I don’t believe in the butterfly effect on the scale of butterfly->hurricane, but the life or death of a relative would certainly cascade powerfully through several generations of human events. It’s remotely possible that I would have gone to law school, inherited my father’s practice in Florida, and ended up today as a dumpy, balding, middle-aged attorney.

Okay, take another look at the LJ icon for this post… see? It could have happened. The smile would have been different, though.

I’m glad my kids have grandparents on Sandra’s side. I miss my own parents, but I’m happy with the way things are today. Any changes I need to make are changes I’ll make in my present, and my future.

–Howard

I’ve been doing some reading up on recycling, and it’s kind of distressing. It turns out the whole thing is mostly bogus.

1) It doesn’t save money. Only recycled aluminum saves anybody any money. The rest of it — paper, plastic, “green”, whatever — is all subsidized by local, state, and in some cases federal money.

2) It doesn’t help the environment. In most cases more energy is spent creating new stuff from old stuff than creating new stuff from raw stuff. Paper comes from tree-farm trees, not old-growth forests, so you’ve got a renewable resource right there. I’m not sure what the energy I/O is for plastics, but since you’ve usually got oil-fired equipment making your oil-based goods, burning more fuel oil in order to save a bit on the longer-chain polymers is likely a wash. Again, aluminum is the notable exception. This is why aluminum recyclers and junkyards full of metal don’t need government subsidies.

3) Landfills are good things. With current technology and “green” legislation surrounding them, they don’t stink, and they end up as beautiful parks, wildlife preserves, and golf courses when they’re filled up. We’re not running out of space for them, either. Note also that landfills end up as very, very deep carbon sinks for those of you worried about greenhouse gases. Tree-farm trees soak up carbon dioxide from the atmosphere, that carbon stays in the paper they get turned into, and then we BURY IT FOREVER. Oh, and then we plant MORE TREES.

4) It makes us feel good. Um… so what? I’d rather learn to feel good planting trees than sorting my plastic wastes.

I got onto this anti-recycling kick after watching a very entertaining episode of “Penn & Teller: Bullshit” on DVD. But that was just entertainment (and rather foul-mouthed entertainment at that), right? I decided to do some reading up, to see how much of what they were saying actually held water.

It turns out it all did. Recycling is a Big Lie, perpetrated by misguided, uneducated idealists, and funded by People In Favor of Big Government.

Okay, before you flame me, read up a bit.
Link, Link, Link. From those articles you should be able to Google your way into all kinds of additional information.

All that said, we have a recycling bin here at home and we’re keeping it. Why? Because the taxpayers here in Orem, UT are subsidizing it. I can get a recycling bin for $3.00 a month, or another garbage can for $6.00 a month. I no longer harbor any illusion about the recycling being “good.” It’s just a trash can I don’t mind keeping in the garage because what goes into it isn’t smelly.

–Howard