People tell me Schlock brings them happiness in the morning. This is nice. But where am *I* supposed to get *MY* morning happy from?

Answer — Today I get it from Penny Arcade. (The permalink to today’s strip will likely be here)

And in a very related note, “It’s like drinking unicorn giggles” is the phrase that pays. Or at least it should be. If you’re running a radio station, please see to that.

The sewer guys are out front with the manhole cover up. As a male, I was REQUIRED to walk out and look down the hole to see if there was poo in it.

As it turns out, there was no poo, but there WAS a television camera “robot” on a cable. They’ve been filming our sewers (report at 11:00!) in an effort to update the maps the city keeps of the sewage system. This was quite cool.

They also had a tool there called a something-or-other cutter (where “something-or-other” is the name of the pipe that runs from the house to the sewer line, which name I’ve inconveniently forgotten, and which pipe often sticks so far into the sewer pipe that it blocks the camera-bot). Apparently they used it yesterday to remove a nail.

One thing I learned about the sewer while looking down that hole — do NOT dispose bodies there… not unless they’re in very small pieces. The manhole is person-sized, but the flow-pipe is only about 9 inches in diameter. The manhole is there for access only.

I now return you to my regularly scheduled silence while I finish coloring the bonus materials for Book I.

Twenty-Two Degrees Farenheit (according to the thermometer in TurboSchlock that tells me outside temperature) is a magical temperature. It’s the temperature at which a Jeep Grand Cherokee which has just emerged from a car wash will, when driven at 45mph down State Street, make snow.

This was very cool to watch. The jeep looked clean and wet — no snow to be seen anywhere. But it was dripping, and trailing it was a cloud of snowflakes and ice crystals, some quite large. I watched for four blocks as the effect slowly dissipated, and the whole time I was trying to figure out why I’d never seen anything like it before. The answer is simple: water temperature must be perfect, and air temperature must be perfect. Otherwise the water freezes on the vehicle (I’ve seen THAT before) or drips off and freezes a few moments later on the road (I suppose I’ve seen that, too.)

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the flowers. In the winter you have to give pause for other stuff, because there aren’t any flowers yet.

–Howard

That little tickle in my throat means it’s time to start front-loading the vitamin C.

I will not get sick. I will not get sick. I will not get sick.

–Howard