Category Archives: Funnies
This isn’t posts about funny stuff. These are posts I wrote to be funny. They’re probably untrue. Don’t cite me as a reference.
Behind the scenes on the set of LUCY
This actually* (*should have) happened on the set of LUCY:
MORGAN FREEMAN: It has been estimated that human beings only use 100% of their brains.
LUC BESSON: CUT! Mister Freeman, it says 10%.
MF: But… that’s ridiculous. Nobody still believes that.
LB: The script says 10%.
MF: I’m not sure I can sell that line. I rather doubt anyone can sell that line. Perhaps 90%, but ten?
LB: How’s this? Your pay goes up by 10% for every 10% below 100% you’re able to sell me.
MF: …
LB: I’m serious.
MORGAN FREEMAN: It has been estimated, and subsequently proven through rigorous experimentation, that human beings use NEGATIVE ONE THOUSAND PERCENT of their brains…
(By Howard Tayler, originally posted to Facebook. Now it has a permanent home.)
On Language Security
“Puns happen because bad people exploit security flaws in language.” — Howard Tayler
On Beanstalks
