Tuesday I had an injection to treat a case of “Morton’s Neuroma.” The podiatrist took care to explain that while “neuroma” sounds like cancerous words (“melanoma” leaps to mind) the “oma” part just means “diseased,” in a lumpy sort of way.
My family doctor said much the same thing when he explained that the weird little lump in my left forearm was a lipoma. Today he removed it (just in case, for biopsy) and I’m pleased to announce that it was a much more pleasant experience than having a nerve in my foot shot up with cortizone. This is probably due in no small part to the fact that I don’t walk around on my forearms. Also, there are fewer nerves there.
Still, the procedure was disconcerting. After four injections of local anaesthetic Doctor Harline cut my arm open with a scalpel, scissored the hole a little wider with a wicked-looking set of scissors, and then started kneading, like he was trying to pop the largest zit I’ve ever had. I asked him if he wasn’t supposed to call 1-800-BLUE-STAKES before digging around that way (he laughed quite genuinely — I am a professional, after all), but after a moment he DID pop the largest zit I’ve ever had.
The picture (safely sanitized in a specimen cup) is behind the cut.
This particular lipoma is relatively small, about the size of a big raisin. Only it’s made out of fat.
Anyway, that’s two *omas I’ve had treated in one week. You’ll forgive me if I’m feeling a little light-headed.